I have come to understand that there are much difference between those people that we regularly hang out with (I call them the regulars) and a friend.
It may not sound interesting to your hearing, but we do interchange them on a regular basis. Probably because the regulars are always there when ever we are making it. They tend to assist us when they see that there is much possibility that they would gain more than they sow. But the truth is that, you can only see them when you are at the top, and still they don’t care about you, even if they do it’s 95% for their selfish gains.
Now to speak of a true friend, you never know them till you fall, till when there seems to be no way out of a situation, they surface from nowhere and they’ll always find a way out of your mess with a 5% selfish interest (and that’s for you to see them as a friend).
A little about what made me write this article. I have a book where I keep contact of any one I come in contact with. Not just together, I have a column for foreign schools, foreign friends, Ibadan contacts, IMO contacts, and Abuja contacts, then a column for friends (I can’t forget my friend’s address so they are in a place) then I have a column for family members (they are my best friends) and lastly, my best friends column a little above that of my family members (they tend to know more of my personal secrets than my family members, it may sound weird but there are certain things you confide in a friend that you can’t to your family, there are gists only meant for friends).
I found out that those people that occupies the Best friends column are those that I never expected although they are not up to 10 but they sure are the best, most stays far, the closer ones are not even that close. And I them with the below qualities.
Good Friends: they inspire, always giving advice that we seem not to agree with even if it’s true, always staring at you whenever you are hanging out with those regulars, they act weird whenever you come closer to them, some tend to be shy, some have this feelings of inferiority complex. And so many more we could think/ could not think of.
Regulars: always making demands, secretly laughs at you whenever you are down (that’s why we always try to impress them trying to be who we are not), they already have a replacement for you or leaves you when they find new ones.
Good friends: loves you even at your odd moments, you find peace around them, they are or act invisible. We don’t care to know.
Regulars: they are always visible, and appears ‘only’ when you are great to their standard or expectations.
In summary, we should be wise in choosing our friends, always test your friends. “A friend IN NEED is a friend INDEED”. You are very important to your friends.
Much love, from me to you!!!💖💛💓