Step 1: Become Your Own Best Friend
How many times a day do you hear a voice telling you that you can’t do something? Or you’ll look stupid? That same voice is in everybody’s head. Always telling people they’re not good enough for something. But, it takes just as much effort for that voice to say something negative as it does positive.
There’s a quote “If you talked to your best friend the way you talked to yourself, would they still be your friend?” Well, would they? And if not, doesn’t that say something about all the negative things you’ve been telling yourself?
So, the first step is too start changing that voice in your head. Every time you hear the negative voice, start thinking about what your best friend would say to you instead. Or your mum or dad. Remind yourself of their words of encouragement. Sometimes you just need to believe in someone else’s belief in you.
Step 2: Imagine Your Future As Bright As You Can
This isn’t some positive, feel good “just imagine and your dreams will come true” speech. What I mean by this is literally sit down, close your eyes and envision where you want to be in the future. Visualise every minor detail. Because that is going to be massively motivational for you!
Think about it this way, what’s going to make you hungrier: Thinking about that delicious burger you’re going to eat for dinner, filled with a mouth-watering, tender patty, crispy fresh lettuce, Camembert cheese and a delicious, ripe, juicy tomato packed between two perfectly toasted buns.
Or a bog standard burger?
When you think about where you want to be with as much detail as you can, you’ll provide yourself with more hunger and motivation to make it happen.
Step 3: Stop Think About What Can Go Wrong, Start Thinking About What Can Go Right
In every situations there are hundreds or thousands of possible outcomes, which outcomes are you focusing on most? The negative ones or the positive ones? Like I said earlier, stop focusing all your time on a negative outcome that, chances are, won’t even happen, and start focusing on the positive outcomes. Believe me, I know this is easier said than done.
I’ve had days where negative outcomes keep popping into my head again and again, 100’s of times. And every time they do, I’d acknowledge them and then choose to let them pass. Because your time and energy is better off spent thinking about the positive outcome instead. This is a skill that takes time to develop. But that time is going to pass anyway. Do you want to spend the rest of your life only thinking of the negatives because you don’t want to spend time changing your habits of mind?